Bittersweet Vision
by Sabaku no Gnora
Summary: "In it forever?" He asked quietly. Then a vision hit me, and I understood. I smiled knowingly. "Forever." BDP2 Spoiler. Updated 05/04/2013: Note at the end


**A/N: Just a little something I had to write after seeing Breaking Dawn Part 2. ****This one-shot, my friend, is unbeta'd so I do apologize in advance. **

**Thanks for the support, and hope you enjoy**

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_Hmm… plum or burgundy?_

I gazed into the mirror for what felt like trillionth time in my immortal life as I held two blouses in front of me in pure contemplation. I have been staring at them for the past hour or so.

_Blue. Jasper loves blue._ I finally mused.

My body stiffened at the use of his name in my thoughts. My hands clenched around the thin material of the two shirts to the point of tearing as I braced myself for the oncoming replay of that dreaded vision. _Damn it. I liked those shirts._

The room shifted until I found myself standing, more like being forced to stand, in the sidelines of a raging battle taking place in a snow covered clearing in the middle of a forest. The sound of granite heads and limbs being torn off filled the air as they were met by their victims screams in outrage and pain. The sweet stench of burning corpses suffocated the place, marking deaths from both sides of the battlefield. But that was far from what was compelling my attention to the center of the battlefield at this moment. Jane's piercing red eyes were focused on Jasper. He dropped to the ice ridden floor on his knees in pain. My breath hitched as I failed miserably to suppress a cry.

_Not him. Not again._

I tried to run to his aid but found myself frozen in place, being restrained yet again by my bodyguards. I struggled and struggled, and when I thought I found an opening, I was put back into place with a small shove and small backlash as punishment for my behavior. After I stopped resisting, resigned to my fate in captivity, did I finally look up and meet his eyes.

_Well this is new, _I told myself.

Through the mussed curtain of honey blond hair covering his head, his golden eyes met my fearful child-like ones. With renewed strength and anger I began to fight back against my captors once again, but stopped to look up when I saw a faint flicker of movement coming from his direction. Jasper was shaking his head limply, pained eyes and all set on my own. His grave expression said everything. He was telling me to stop struggling, and so I did. If I were human, and have been able to cry, I know that I would have tears streaming down my face. But my mind was reeling. Never, not once in the time I had spent with Jasper did he ever give up in a battle. So what made this time any different from the rest?

I looked dead straight at him in the eye, wordlessly demanding him to do the same, and mouthed one word. 'Why?'

The corner of his mouth twitched upward a bit as if he was trying to smile, but failed when it came out more as a grimace, the effects of Jane's power penetrating him taking a toll. Then he mouthed those unmistakable words.

'I love you.'

My body went limp in the arms of my captors as I absorbed his goodbye. I let my head fall in resignation, but still managed to register two flickers of movement stalking toward Jasper's direction.

I didn't need to look up to see who those flickers were.

I closed my eyes as my tearless sobs filled the air, knowing what lied ahead for my husband.

Jasper choking scream echoed. The snap of granite being torn off. The crackling of fire being started, growing louder as the flame consumed whatever was in it. But I knew.

And where was I? I was in the sidelines, being restrained by my captors. When I finally looked up Jane's glare was what met my pained face. Then she smiled.

_God I hate that girl._

My eyes fluttered as the scene shifted again and was brought back to the present in the sanctuary of my walk-in closet. Surrounded by the aroma of newly bought clothing, and sweet leather of my designer purses, I closed my eyes as I wrapped my arms around me to suppress the emptiness forming in my chest. Who am I kidding, not even my precious stilettos will take the pain away.

I dropped the long forgotten, torn articles of clothing to the floor and began to pace.

_It was just a vision. Just a vision._ I chanted to myself in self assurance. Then I paused. _Well, technically its not even a vision anymore. More like an outcome that never happened._

_But this vision was different. Jasper was different. _That was what had me on the edge. I became thoughtful.

_Maybe this was the same vision. Just with a new perspective. _Since there has been times where I was too distracted that I didn't see everything through one sweep through of a vision. I had to replay those visions over and over again to catch every single detail. This time isn't so different either.

_Just a vision..._

_A vision that will never happen_, I concluded._ Ever. _

I continued to pace around the bedroom, to the point I felt the wearing of hard wood floor with each step I took. I'll have to make a note to fix that.

I stopped pacing, but my hands continued to fidget at my sides.

Then a resounding noise of boulders colliding brought me out my stupor, startling me. And I'm a hard person to startle so it was curious that something did. I snuck a glance through a small crack of light through the blue curtain of my window.

The boys were wrestling, again. Based on the irritated look on Edward's face, Emmett must have beaten him, and from the two forms toppling each other trying to outmaneuver one another, it looked like Emmett found a new sparring partner. Edward stalked off into the forest leaving Emmett and his opponent to their play fight. I'll have to remember to tease him about it later. I smiled as another vision hit me. The winner of the fight would be Jasper.

_Jasper…_

The name alone brought me such great joy enough to warm my cold dead heart, yet also great pain that left a burning hole in my chest, ever since…

_Don't think about it._

_'Just stop thinking about it? More like forget about it.'_

_Oh right, because it's that easy?_

_'Yes you can',_ the inner voice insisted.

I huffed and stomped my foot. I should have felt ridiculous about talking to myself.

_Ugh I feel like Edward now._

I froze. _Edward. The stupid mindreader! _

_What if he overheard…?_ _No he couldn't have, he retreated into the woods remember...?_

_ 'He's still in range'_, the annoying voice reminded me.

I have to get out of here.

I began to recite Henry's famous speech from the Virginia convention as I grabbed hold of whatever paper and pen I could find in the room. I scrawled a simple message for him find when he came back from his wrestling match with Emmett.

**Went hunting. Be back soon. **

I folded the note and placed it on the bedside table. I looked back down to the note and kissed my palm before brushing my hand over it. I hated lying to him, I hated the fact that I couldn't look at him without breaking down. I just need time to think, and wallow in my guilt about the vision. He didn't have to suffer along with me. I know he'll find the note, and know something is wrong after I don't return within a day.

Without a backward glance into the room I have grown to love with the man I love, I left. I crept into the hall to make my way out the door. I jumped off the balcony and landed softly onto the mossy grassland. Then I broke into a run.

I was flying. I felt the cool breeze brush along the side of my face as I sped through the trees. Leaves rustled as my feet made contact with the mossy earth.

I had no direction, all I wanted was to be far, far away from here, from everything. I ran and ran until I reached the border of what seemed to be Canada.

The speech was finally coming to an end so I walked the rest the of the way, finally out of range of my mind reading brother.

… _Give me liberty, or give me death!_

Death. Jasper.

I felt my knees buckle before me, and my body hit the damp ground. I let out an intake of breath as I choked on a sob growing within my chest. The vision from the clearing of the Volturi came rushing back. The tearing, the flames, and the screaming now fresh in my mind.

I curled myself into a ball, wrapping my arms around knees as I lay on my side. The pain of fear and loss never subsided.

"Make it stop…" I sobbed quietly as I strained my eyes to close shut. If vampires could cry, I definitely would be right now.

I don't know how long I laid there in the wet ground, as the slosh from the snow seeped through my clothing, but heard the soft thuds of someone's approach and then felt a pair of warm arms wrap around my petite form to cradle me in their chest.

We sat there, in silence, or least silence from him while I continued my tearless sobs. I didn't need to open my eyes to know who it was, the scent alone told me everything. I hid my face into my brother's shoulder as he rubbed circles into my back. It was futile, but I accepted the gesture with immense gratitude.

_Thank you_, I spoke to him telepathically.

"Anytime." Edward's musical voice murmured.

After a while, I finally opened my eyes and looked towards the north as I saw the sun start to set behind the cover of trees. I have been crying, or at least the closest to crying for a vampire, for sixteen hours.

"A day actually." I heard Edward chuckle. I looked up to him, his light golden eyes twinkled in the dim sunlight, and his lip lifted upright from the corner. _His trademark crooked grin._ I scoffed. He glared back, and continued to stare at me, waiting.

I sighed. "Where's Bella?" I asked, trying to change the topic at hand.

"She and Nessie are with Jacob. They wanted to celebrate... We were invited as well, but none of us felt fit to actually attend." He replied smiling. _It worked._ "No it didn't." _Damn it._

He continued to pierce me with his eyes, waiting for an answer to the many questions he had.

I pushed him away, and sat crossed legged on the ground. I refused to meet his gaze, so I focused my eyes on the counting the droplets of water dripping down the petals of a flower. Neither of us said anything.

"What happened Alice…? Why did you leave?" He finally whispered.

I closed my eyes and flinched as the vision flickered through my thoughts once more. _I'm surprised you didn't see it back at the clearing._

A look of understanding dawned on him as his eyes bulged out a bit before turning back to normal.

"Oh…"

_Oh doesn't even cover it._

"Now you know." I replied coldly as I stood up and started towards the opposite direction of the big house for the second time.

I felt a hand grasp my wrist to pull me back. "Why are you running?" Edward growled. Confusion was evident in his eyes.

"I can't deal with this right now…"I looked down defeated. "I watched him die Edward, and there was nothing I could have done to stop it. I failed him…"

We stood there in silence, as my words sunk in.

"For a seer, you're blind." I looked at him bewildered.

"Open your eyes! The Volturi is gone, and _we're_ safe. What more could you ask for?" He replied with an intensity that almost knocked me down onto my feet.

"Look… I know what you're going through. I have felt the feelings of loss… and worthlessness plenty…" I knew he was referring to almost losing Bella twice with James and cliff jumping, "I can't promise that the feelings will ever go away, but eventually you'll have to forgive yourself and move on.

"You might not see it yourself, but… you did save him. You stopped the vision from happening. You saved him Alice." He finished soft, but firm.

I felt his grip on my wrist weaken until he finally let go of me completely. "I'm not going to stop you… From running I mean, but please just know that your absence is hurting all of _us_." I know who he meant by _us_.

_How is he…?_

"He's barely… living. If vampires could live I mean."

I glared at him. _How bad?_

He smiled crookedly. "What do you mean by bad exactly?"

I groaned. _That bad?_

"You have no idea."

_How could I be so stupid! _

"Very stupid."

_Not helping_… I all but growled at him. He chuckled.

"I have to go find him, and explain myself don't I?" I finally asked, readying myself for an hour journey back to the big house and face the wrath of Esme and pain of my husband. _My husband. Jasper._ I felt a smile tug at the corners of my face just thinking about the tall soldier I fell in love with.

He smirked. "Not necessarily…" He replied vaguely, with a huge grin now plastered on his face. He's hiding something.

"Spill it mind reader." I demanded him.

Edward's gaze shifted to something behind me, before landing back on me.

I heard rustling behind me, and slow, quiet foot steps approach before they came to a halt.

"Alice."

_Shit!_ That voice. The musical voice I have loved since the day I first heard him speak to me in the vision of the diner. I quickly turned around, and there he stood in his beautiful perfection. The dim sunlight hidden behind the trees danced off his skin as it shimmered in a beautiful array of diamonds. His golden hair that reached to his collar was mussed from the wind blowing as if he ran. His mouth was turned up into that charming smile I have grown to love endlessly since I first met him, though that joy did not meet his eyes. His eyes… His golden eyes that once glimmered with hope were now empty, as if he truly was dead. They pierced me to my soul so deeply, I had to look away in shame.

"So... you know?"

"Yes." He replied curtly. His eyes betrayed no emotion. Actually they showed no emotion at all.

I gulped. "Everything?"

He just stared at me. "Enough..." He paused before sighing and continue his thought, "to understand why you left."

I felt him walk until he stood right in front of me. He lifted up a hand, as if to touch me, but changed his mind at the last second. Rejection washed over me. He didn't want me…

"Jasper."

As soon as his name slipped out of my mouth, I felt him. His emotions were in chaos right now. I felt relief, and joy, probably of seeing me safe. Then I felt it, a flicker of anger, sadness, doubt, and pain. I hurt him. And probably to the point he didn't want me anymore.

I kept my gaze on the ground as I spoke. "I'm sorry."

He didn't answer, so I took it as an invitation to continue what I had to say. A hole in my chest started to form as I prepared myself.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness, you deserve better..."

Silence filled the air, as I continued to stare our feet.

"I guess I'll be leaving right..." My voice died as I saw his feet step closer until he closed the gap between us. I looked up, face to face, his molten eyes glaring wholes into mine.

"Where do ya' think you're going?" He asked icily.

"Nowhere in particular..." I replied in a small voice.

He continued to glare at me, his resolve unbreakable.

"Fine... You want the truth?"

He continued to stare at me, before nodding curtly.

Well, here it goes...

I told him about the vision, and how the vision changed last time. I told how angered I was at myself for not being quick enough to save him, making him give up and resign to his fate. I told him what he told me right before he died. How pained and hopeless I felt watching him die. I told him everything, his gaze never wavering, only softening.

When I finished, I remained silent and stared at him, his face remaining impassive as ever.

Seconds passed by...

Minutes...

Finally after what felt like half an hour...

I heard Edward chuckle at this, so I had to hold back a growl.

Jasper finally spoke. Here comes the anger I told myself, and closed my eyes.

It never came.

"Because I love you." He whispered quietly before grabbing me by the waist to pull me against him. He looked down at me, our faces merely inches apart. I then felt another emotion. _His love._

_'Because I love you.'_

Then it clicked.

Because he loved me, he was protecting from getting involved in a fight which would for sure end in a loss on our side. Because he loved me, he was willing to die for me.

_Oh my god..._ Edward was right. Blind indeed.

Goes to show that I really do have a one-tracked mind.

Jasper must have seen the realization on face by the amused look he was giving me before closing the distance until he nuzzled my jaw.

"You silly girl." He whispered before his lips came crashing down on me.

I stood there wide-eyed, frozen from intensity of his kiss. Almost like lovers lips meeting each other after years being apart. My eyes fluttered closed as I felt my lips start to move against his. His lips were soft and warm against my own, contradicting vampire belief of us being cold and hard to the touch. I felt his arms slither to wrap around my small waist, pulling me close to him.

After a moment we parted, and we were left breathing heavily, though no breathing was needed anyway. He rested his forehead against mine.

He looked down lovingly at me, this time the emotion from earlier, fully reaching his eyes. "In it forever?" He asked quietly.

Then a vision hit me, and I understood.

I smiled knowingly. "Forever."

**Fin**

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******5/4/2013 - As of this year, I'm not into Twilight. No offense to those who do like Twilight, just understand that I'm just not the same person anymore. Since this was my first piece I have ever written and posted on Fanfiction, I won't delete it (though I very tempted). This piece will always a special place in my heart, and it was fun while it lasted. Thanks for the support for this story. **

******Peace!**


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